Tuesday, November 3, 2009

...first show in Austin...


So there are many people in my life who tell me on a constant, daily, sometimes hourly basis, that I am meant to be pursuing my music. They tell me to believe because they believe. They tell my I should know this, because they know this. But there is always doubt. Sometimes small, nagging, voices in the back of my head. Sometimes it is full on, soul-deadening dread. Am I good enough? Is everybody just humouring me? Am I setting myself up to fail? And even with every leg of this trip in step with my every stride, almost as if the ground is being built seconds before my foot rest on it, I feel fear.

And then a night like last night happens. A simple trip to my first open-mic night in Austin, only meant to get the ball rolling, cut my teeth, maybe meet some people, became my first gig. This show was complete with multiple people offering help, support, outrageous compliments and actual future shows...I was high on the positive feedback, drunk on the familiar but sorely missed feeling of being onstage and engaging an audience...it was in short a beautiful justification that, yes, I am here for a reason.

You all can go ahead and shake your heads, roll your eyes and practice your "I told you so's". just know, that I will need you to remind me many more times again. It's how I roll.

Thanks to all of you and your support and thanks to Austin. Here's hoping tonight is just as epic...too much to ask?